A Good Christian

I have been meaning to get this post written for a while now. But I haven't done it. Or blogged at all for that matter! Oh how life can kill a persons love of writing! 

I want to bring up this phrase, "good Christian."

Have you ever heard this label? I have heard this from people within the church (as in the body of Christians as a whole. Not just the building I attend. Although I have heard this label at my church too.) and within the secular culture. And the label brings the same expectations no matter if the person using the term is Christian or not. If you ask anyone what a good Christian is their answer would be something like...

A good Christian acts nice and smiles a lot and helps to take care of people.

I can't even begin to describe how much that goes against the Bible about what a Christian should be. And people in the church strive to be labeled a good Christian by these standards! WikiHow even has a page on how to be a good Christian. According to that site, there are 19 steps to becoming a good Christian.

Really?

The first step was "Act like a Christian no matter what."

Please tell me they were just kidding. Please.

You do realize anyone can act like a Christian and not really be a Christian, right?

 I am involved in community theater. I love to act!

And I am semi good at it, if I do say so myself! ;) haha!

But I can act like a lot of things that are not really me. And acting like any character has never made that character a part of me. So how is acting like a Christian making that "Christian" act a part of them? It isn't. It is an act. Why would a Christians number 1 goal be to act like a Christian?

Jesus sent his disciples to go out and make disciples! Not to go act like good people! Anyone can do that! He sent them to tell about Jesus and to build relationships with others and to cast out demons and pray and heal! He never said, "Hey guys. I think if you guys went out and acted like a bunch of stuck up, goody two shoes, theologians, people would want to follow me. Don't you think? Let's give this a shot!" I MEAN REALLY! And Jesus taught of faith, grace, and love! He taught about living to follow God's will for your life and to seek the least. And guess what! Jesus hung out with people that were not Christians. I'm not even kidding. Jesus hung out with the woman at the well (John 4), and even Matthew, one of his disciples was a tax collector! (Matthew 9) Tax collectors were known thieves! And so many others that the culture would not see as the type of people one should associate themselves with. But they too came to live by Gods leading and living in His faith, grace, and love!

(As a little side note, the Bible says God is Love. It says so in 1 John 4:8 just to name one location. This is not the only occurrence of this phrase. But the word that was used for love here means everlasting, never ending, love. God is never ending love. And this love is not like the English word we have for love. It implies so much more. It was used for a strong love that could never be broken no matter the circumstances. So not only is his love everlasting, it is strong. It wasn't just a never ending little crush like you had in kindergarten. It was a strong, powerful, passionate, never ending, everlasting, love. Wow!)

Basically I believe that the Bible sends us as Christians to follow what God has called for each individual person. My walk with God and the plans he has for me, are nothing like the ones he has for you. We are called to live the life God has called us individually to, and this is to bring glory to Him! Our God!

Now please don't think I'm saying that "oh everyone just do what God says and life will always be happy!" that would be this "Good Christian" label that I am trying to eliminate! Or at least change the definition of!

Because Jesus followed what God called him to do, it wasn't always so pleasant. Dying on the cross for sins He had never committed wasn't an easy task God had planned for him. He went through hard times and He dealt with hard stuff! I can't imagine he ever "acted" like those were easy things. He knew it was hard and He knew it was His calling. His time in the garden to pray before His death showed us that. (Luke 22) Sometimes we face massive trials in our lives. Now, in today's culture you probably will not be hung on a cross. But you might deal with tasks that seem more than you can handle, or difficult family, work, or school situations. Maybe sins that you don't know what to do with. Or maybe you have abuse or trauma in your past, or even in your life now. God didn't say it would be easy.

John Piper said, "The difference between Uncle Sam and Jesus Christ is that Uncle Sam won't enlist you in his service unless you are healthy and Jesus won't enlist you unless you are sick." (Thanks for this quote Stephanie!)

This isn't saying that God isn't going to be present in you life unless your have the flu. It is saying that God can work in even the worst brokenness in person, and He takes that and turns it into strengths and not just strengths that we can boast in but a strength that can only come from God! (Judges 7:2)

So truly the Biblical definition of a good Christian should be someone that is following what God has called them to and living out Jesus and bringing glory to God. But that is such a personal thing between one person and God that you can't judge or label someone else with "good Christian."

My thoughts on Proverbs 31

Women in the church often look towards Proverbs 31 for an example of living a Godly life as a woman and more specifically as a wife but this text certainly applies to single women and young women as well. Verses 10-31 describe a woman who fears the Lord. To be honest the woman in these verses sounds like superwoman to me! But I will get more into that in a moment. Lets start with the beginning.

The first verse in Proverbs 31 states that this was and oracle that King Lemuel's mother taught him. Many believe that Lemuel was King Solomon. Lemuel means belonging to God and is considered a symbolic name of Solomon. So there is just a little background for you. Now the word oracle is not one you hear everyday. In fact I'm pretty sure I have never heard anyone say that. 

Except maybe in a sermon... 

But out of a Biblical context? no.

According to dictionary.com the word oracle means "a person who delivers authoritative, wise, or highly regarded and influential pronouncements."

So this really starts out with a little shout of "HEY! what she has to say is important!" Right? Also we should take into consideration that King Solomon's mother was Bathsheba.

Remember Bathsheba?

She was the woman who was bathing on the roof of her house (sounds crazy, I know. But that was normal, practical, and culturally acceptable.) when King David, who was supposed to be at war, saw her. He was struck by her beauty that he had her brought to him and he seduced her. (I'm thinking I may need to do a David blog post soon!) Well, then he finds out that she becomes pregnant with him! Woops! Right? Well Bathsheba's husband was a soldier in King David's army. To make a long story short, King David eventually had that man killed.

So the woman who teaches her son this oracle has been through a lot, wouldn't you say? I am sure she learned much through her life and gained much wisdom from her experiences. So this isn't just coming from anyone. It is coming from a woman who has seen a lot.

In the first nine verses she gives her son some wise words about what to do and what not to do. Understandably. But here is the part I am really trying to get to, verses 10-31, the woman who fears the Lord.

Bathsheba is explaining the kind of wife Solomon should find. 

"She is far more precious than jewels.(verse 10)" 

once again. I think she wants him to find superwoman. But I nonetheless, it goes on to describe a woman her husband can trust, she is a helper to him, she is a hard worker, and she is wise and educated. She provides for her household, and not just as in she does the grocery shopping and gets the kinds ready for school in the morning. She is also going out and selling the things she has made and investing in a field! (Most women today probably wouldn't invest in a field. But hey! If it works, go for it! haha!) My point is she is not simply a woman who stays at home. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with being a stay at home mom! I consider it the single most difficult job ever! But I have seen churches that believe that all women should stay at home and solely depend upon their husband for finances. I don't think that is what God calls every woman to. If that is what God has called you to then I think that is wonderful! And maybe one day that will be my role. I honestly have no idea! But I think women should be able to work if the need arises. Proverbs 31 does not depict a woman who is unable to step up when a need arises or is only able to live through her husband. 

Of course, I am still in high school so I understand that my writing about marriage may put me on shaky ground with some of my readers. I understand that I have no first hand experience on this subject! So feel free to correct me! :)

I think that a woman should be able to work just as the man. The Bible clearly states that the man should be the head of the household. I concur. Men and women were created so differently! But not one better than the other. I believe the differences complement one another. That is why they are made to be side by side. But God calls men to be the leaders and protectors. But a wife at her mans side should be able to help him!

I do come at this from the perspective of a very independent person. So I personally find it very hard to imagine myself one day not working. I got my first "job" at nine. I was a mothers helper for a family friend. I would clean, cook, help her kids with homework, or whatever needed to be done. I wouldn't know what to do with myself without some sort of work! Even if is simply volunteer! 

I need something to do with my self! haha! :) 

I also want to point out that these verses are written to her son to find this woman. This woman had to already have these virtues before she got married. He was to seek this woman out! Then she could be a wife with those virtues. But he wasn't to just find some lady he thought was pretty and when they got married she would somehow magically become this woman who fears the Lord! No! She needed to be seeking these virtues and seeking her Lord long before Solomon ever came along! 

If you are a woman who thinks that the fact that you are not married means that this passage does not apply to you then I am sorry to say you are sooooo mistaken. The fact that you and I are unmarried means it applies to us more than anything! We should be striving to be this woman! We should be hard workers and women that people can trust and work to grow in all of her virtues and most of all grow in our God! Because here's the deal, 93% of people end up married. Yes, there is that 7%. God didn't call everyone to marriage. Goodness, Jesus, God's own son never married! And Paul! He was single his whole life too! (But really! With the life Paul lived I don't know a woman who could put up with that! A wreck of the nerves Paul would be as a husband! Always going off preaching, getting persecuted, stranded on islands, put in prison! My word! That would turn any wife into a nervous wreck! haha!)

So my point is there is much to gain from this passage. No matter who you are or what stage of life you are in and that it is not against the Bible for a woman to work outside of the home.

The laughable "youth resources" (Particularly for girls)

Hello all readers! I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas celebrating the birth of our savior! :) I hope you were able to spend it with family and friends and that it was perfect no matter the circumstances! :)

Now! I need to rant a bit.

Have you ever been to the "youth resources" section of a Christian book store?

If you answered yes then you will totally understand this next line.

ahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahaha! Oh! That just makes me laugh to tears!

If you answered no then continue reading for an explanation. (Then you can refer to the long line of laughter with understanding.)

Okay! The youth resources section of the Christian book stores is lacking so much! It is usually the smallest section in the store. But that is only one of the problems. Most of the books do not reach the heart or life of teens in any way! I can't speak for the books written for guys, 

but the books that are written for girls almost all start out with something like this... 

"This book for teen girls is to help you come closer to God in this stage of your life when you are growing up, your body is changing, and you are stuck between an adult and child." 

Okay! Let me start with the obvious. Your body is changing? ew! What the heck! This is really how you want to start the book? And almost all of them say this! That limits your audience to twelve year olds. And even when I was 12! No one wanted to read that stuff! Really. No part of me has "changed" in years. I am the same height and weight I was 4 years ago. And was growing up some horrible experience for the adults that write this? Because seriously, I was moody at 12 but that is about it. What about growing up traumatized these writers? There is something totally wrong about that. And here is the other thing wrong with this. Most of the time we teens don't feel "stuck" between an adult and a child. I have seen some parents that make their kids feel this way when the expect them to act like adults but treat them like children. So I totally get that! But that is not every teenager in America.

Moving on.

There are a few books for teen girls that don't start with stupid things like that. But they tend to focus on staying pure until marriage. And that is great! I totally agree! I think that sex should be saved for marriage because it's Biblical and in my own personal life I have decided to wait for marriage because I want my little sisters to do the same thing. But that is not the only trial teen girls face! What about drugs? What about the age old question of 'how far is too far'? What about friends who have different beliefs than you? What about building a foundation of your faith? What about when your personal convictions differ from your parents, and staying respectful to them with the differences? They seem to just breeze over these things.

And the things that so many of the books tell us girls things that just aren't true! In the Christian world dressing modestly is a HUGE thing! And I totally understand it. But please, do not explain the reason to dress modestly with stupid things like "The things you wear will affect guys thoughts." and "Cleavage revealing tops will only draw eyes and thoughts to one place." and "Men will not be able to control their thoughts and desires." What in the world! And I have heard this spiel so many times! So lets boil these reasons down to the source. You will get raped if you wear revealing clothes. You have got to be kidding me. And they don't say this outright but it is still instilled in so many Christian girls! I have been to the mall with Christian friends and heard these words "Oh you are just asking for trouble with that skirt." Come on! How about we look at the Biblical perspective of modesty and stop treating teen guys like monsters.

The view the Christian world has seem to taken on about teenage guys is so extremely unbiblical that it is scary. Men have their place, they think differently, they were created differently, they have a different purpose that God created them for. There is no double standard! They are just different standards! Making them out to be evil is honestly just plain wrong!

Teenage men are not horrible. They are not evil. They are not out to get you. And yet that is so how they are portrayed! I have had many teenage Christian friends of mine say they don't ever want to go on a date alone with a guy because they want to make sure that the guy doesn't take advantage of them. Really! Let me point out the obvious. If you have met a guy that you really think would rape you, DON'T GO ON A DATE WITH HIM! Most guys aren't going to do that! They are not all evil! (And this is why courting has become such a big deal. It really doesn't need to be! It is totally a person conviction thing.)

So really! What we need are resources that truly will affect the average teen. We need sources that don't become legalistic about dating. We need sources that don't belittle men! The Bible says over and over about going to fellow Christians for advice. And these writers have the opportunity to do this on a mass scale! But writing legalism and even some things that aren't Biblical it is just wrong!
If you have found something that is a good resource please email or comment and let me know!
I would love to read it!

ugh! There is so much more I can add! I believe I will blog more on this subject soon. This is just my opinion on my Christian teen girls resources. I will get into youth resources in general in another post.

(Now refer to the line of laughter. You get it now, don't you?)

Adoption Sunday

So this is a little holiday that most don't know about. It's not so much of a holiday as it is a day to remember. Remember what? Remember our call to take care of orphans. Adoption is such a gift from God. But let me get into my teacher mode (I am a big sister. I have a very prominent teacher attitude.) for a minute and share some statistics.

Over 130 million children have lost one or both of their parents. They are here in America, Ukraine, Africa, Peru, Germany, Mexico, France, you name the location! 130 million. But you see, that is just big number, right?

Even when I write out. . .

130,000,000

. . . it is still just a big number I can't wrap my mind around.

How about we think about it this way. The May Day Stadium is the largest football stadium in the world. It is located in North Korea. This thing is HUGE! Largest football stadium in the WORLD! And it can only hold 150,000. It would take 867 of those stadiums to hold all of the orphans in the world. Even with that it is hard to imagine.

Do you know how many people consider themselves Christians in the world? 2,039 million. 

That looks like:

 2,039,000,000.

So wait a minute! That's a bigger number than the first! Hold on here! Then that doesn't quite make sense! That would mean there is 1 orphan in the world for every 15 Christians.

Doesn't that make you wonder why there are still orphans in the world?

Here is another little orphan fact. Children age out of the system, weather adoption or foster care, at age 18. In some places younger. They go into the world without any support. They were raised without love and a family. They lack a solid foundation that only a family can give. Can you imagine when you were eighteen and moving out on your own or going to college and having no one to call and remind you of home? No one to encourage you to go after your dreams? In fact, in your whole life, you were never told that you could reach your dreams? It's not easy to live that way. Many of them end up involved in crime or commit suicide once they age out. Suicide rates are higher among teens who were not raised with parents than any other group of people. That statistic is true for EVERY culture. America and all over the world. And once they commit suicide who is there to cry for them? Who is there to miss their presence and personalities? Who loved them enough to miss them?
Everyone deserves someone to cry for them.

Now I want to make this point clear. I do NOT believe that everyone is supposed to adopt. Adoption is something that my family was called to. I have one sister who is adopted. And maybe our family will be called to adoption again. Maybe one day I will be called to adopt in my own family. I just don't know. But I do know that every Christian is called to take care of the orphans. If you have not been called to adopt support a family who is. I can say from experience (as a teenager involved in the process.) that an adopting family needs support both in the process and once they have the child at home. It is the churches (universal) job to provide that support. If  you can't adopt or even support someone financially and all you can do it say "Hey let me watch your kids while you go get paperwork done." that is amazing to parents who are adopting! One less stressful thing for an adopting couple.

I have seen the relief on my moms face! Trust me!

So my whole point to this post is that it is that everyone can and should take part in caring for the orphans.

Everyone needs a forever family and everyone deserves someone to cry for them.

CCT

Legalism - good works and faith

So the definition of Legalism is (according to dictionary.com)

Legalism - the doctrine that salvation is gained through good works.

So good works is a good right! As the name implies! It can never hurt to do something good! You don't get in trouble for helping your brothers and sisters, you will never get fussed at for doing your homework too thoroughly, and you will never go to jail for helping a mom with her groceries! You just won't! But legalism teaches that those good things will get you to get to heaven. That is not what the Bible says! And in fact the Bible does talk about works quite a bit! As a Christian you have the desire to do good works! You just do! You want to spread and show God's love! But no matter how much you do that it can not guarantee your place in heaven! That has to be done with a relationship with God! 


But if you want to hear more about that you can email me (bloggeremailcowgirl@blogspot.com) Or you can comment and request a post about that. Right now I really want to talk about those of us who are Christians. 


Okay! So picture this! 
You are that person that anyone could count on! You never turn your phone off in case a friend needs to talk. You never say no and you are involved in everything everywhere. You are constaly volunteering to help with stuff and take on more than you know what to do with! You are a supporter and friend to everyone! And that begins to become what you are known for. You do unnecessary tasks just because it could help someone out! 
And you fall into a pattern of waking up each day with these goals. 
Great goals! Wonderful things! Nothing wrong with that! 
But maybe you don't put enough time into seeking God or growing your faith. 
But you reason with yourself! As long as I am doing good things for God why does it matter! I was once told that anytime you have to justify something you shouldn't do it! And that has shown so true in my life! But that living each day doing good works but not living by faith is exactly the legalism that is very common for so many people! Now I am not saying that you should stop doing good things and spend all day praying. That is not what the Bible says either! The good deeds you do are made perfect to God by your faith! Your good works alone will not grow your relationship with Christ. Only through faith can that be done! That is why they need to work together! One is not complete without the other!


Here are some verses that show us that!


Why? Because they did not seek it by faith, but as it were, by the works of the law. For they stumbled at that stumbling stone.
Romans 9:32


Do you see that faith was working together with his works, and by works faith was made perfect?
James 2:22

But now, by dying to what once bound us, we have been released from the law so that we serve in the new way of the Spirit, and not in the old way of the written code.

Romans 7:6


Hopefully you enjoy this post and get something from it! If you want to know more please comment or email! I love this topic! :)

Jabez Prayer

So while I was at my dads book signing today I found this book about Jabez Prayer for teens. I was intrigued. So I started reading. It is all about a prayer, a man names Jabez, prayed. It is in 1 Chronicles 4:9-10.

'There was a man named Jabez who was more honorable than any of his brothers. His mother named him Jabez because his birth had been so painful.He was the one who prayed to the God of Israel, "Oh, that you would bless me and expand my territory! Please be with me in all that I do, and keep me from all trouble and pain!" And God granted him his request.'

The word Jabez means Pain. Can you imagine having a name that means pain? Woah! And in their culture a name kind of set you up for life! Solomon means peace as was the first king to rule without war. You lived out your name. And to be named Pain! Ouch! I am not sure what was going through his moms head! But still! He was stuck with it! And he prayed "Oh, that you would bless me and expand my territory! Please be with me in all that I do, and keep me from all trouble and pain!" What a prayer! Right? And God did!

Also, this verse is right in the middle of one of those long "The sons of him and the sons of him and so and so and him and his sons and so forth and so on" sections of the Bible. But for some reason the author stopped to say this about Jabez. So it must be important!

Bless me and expand my territory! What a perfect pair! Because what happens when God bless you? You want to share that blessing! You want to tell the world! You want to help others experience it! Expand my territory! In other words! Lord give me more people to share your blessings with! Okay so here is what most of us are thinking. "Wait a minute! More people? I know lots of people and most of them know I am a Christian. So that is enough. right? I mean lets be serious! I don't always share my blessings with those I already know! So expand! Yeah. I think I am fine the way things are!" And I totally get that! But can you imagine what would happened if you asked God for that! Yes God might totally throw you out of your comfort zone. But wouldn't it be worth it? Could you imagine what God might bless you with and what he might do through you to touch the lives of others! 

Not what you do to touch the lives of others that God blesses. But what God really does through you! Have you ever had those moments where you say just the right thing at just the right moment? And you did not seem to even think about what you said but your timing, tone, and words were just perfect? The words shocked you as they came out of your mouth because they never went through your thought process? And you saw those words touch someone? And later all you can think is wow! God used me there! Those are the moments this prayer is asking God for! When God uses you in someones life in a way only He could! It can blow me away just to think about!

And be with me in all that I do! Have you ever prayed for that? I know I haven't! You might if you are about to take a test or something big is about to happen. You ask God to be with you then. But to say everything! And mean it! I want you in every part of my life! woah! Even if we mean it with all our hearts we all have at least one area we try and hold back. Ultimately God has control over that area of our lives too but, as humans, we feel the need to control it. We really have no control there. But we fell like we should. Forgiveness and trust is are areas I sometimes have a hard time giving over to God! We all have our areas! We are all works in progress at all times. But we need to keep working on those areas and praying through them and seeking God. This prayer does just that!

Keep me from all trouble and pain! For a man named Pain that is a big deal to ask! Keep me from pain! What an amazing thing to ask! I have never prayed for that! Trouble and pain are just part of life. I never thought I could ask to be kept from it! But it is true!

I am not going to post the name of this book in my resources. It had so much good information but was so movement driven and not about the heart that I just could not post it. Praying this verse is about the heart! Meaning it with your whole heart, desiring it with your whole heart, accepting the challenges God gives you with your whole heart, and being willing to change with your whole heart! Not about getting a million teenagers to pray those words.

I am making a commitment to pray that prayer everyday for the next month. But, I would also like to know, what you think of Jabez prayer? Is it something you want to pray into your life? Why or why not?

Dating vs. Courting

So this is a hot topic issue for all Christian teens out there! So I am going to give you my opinion that you may or may not find valuable since I myself am a teen. Well, maybe you will but not your parents. So you can't tell them "Hey I can do that because Counter Cultural Teen does!" I do not want my comment boxes filled with angry parents. Although I think everything I say is things most parents would agree with. I am not a crazy out there kind of person. At least not in my beliefs. Just in my personality.

Dating is where you hang out with guys, get to like them, go out alone with them, watch moves and do all that cutesy couple stuff! And depending on who you are and how long you date you will most likely sleep together. Not to say that everyone who dates has sex, but it is more common in the dating world than in the courting world. I will save purity for another post.

Courting is where you start to like a guy, you get to know and like them, you know you really like them and most likely are going to spend the rest of your life with them before you court(some only court if they know they are going to marry that person), you do not spend anytime alone no matter the atmosphere, many refrain from kissing, and sex is saved for marriage.

So both have pros and cons! I truthfully don't agree with either of those completely. I think you should save sex for marriage. That is that! I agree totally with that and my opinion is ever still. People make mistakes and people chose to stay pure and then they mess up. Life happens. That's why I think you should stay out of situations where that could happen! But you should still spend time one on one.
Sounds like they contradict each other. right? Well not really.
to build any relationship you need time one on one. There are things you might tell or talk about when you are with just one friend that you would not talk about with a group of people! And if you are thinking about marriage it is even more important! He might want to know before the honeymoon that you are deathly scared of even the idea of robots! But you would never say that to a group of people because you would look crazy!  (I am deathly afraid of robots but please keep that to yourself! ;))
The thing to do is to not hang out in places totally alone. Don't go to his house when no one is home. Don't have him over to your house when no one is home. Do not take long road trips with just the two of you! Use common sense! But go get coffee at a coffee shop, go to a fair, walk around town, all cutesy couple stuff, sounds great! Just maybe don't drive there together if its far away ;)

Careful talking about marriage if you have only been dating a short while. And courting relationships do not always lead to marriage. He may have asked you to court him but not to marry him. He probably did not even think of marriage. Just wait on talking about the M word.

My last point, don't just date because a guy asked you out. A guy has to be a good guy. Not sleazy and trying to come on to you. But a good honest (and cute or hot always helps) guy! If he is a good guy then go for it. But still, no matter how cute or how sweet, stick to the stuff above.

So that is my very long and very opinionated first post to In The World Not Of It. About living in the world and in the time God put us in but not being like everyone else. We live above the worlds standards! We get to live for an awesome, amazing, powerful, and relational God who made the heavens and the earth and yet still wants to be a part or our small insignificant lives! Oh how he loves us! It just blows me away sometimes!

PS All this applies to guys too! Y'all can read over and just pretend that everywhere it says guys it really says gals! :)